'Loneliness' Articles
Loneliness stems from an error in the development of a sense of identity. Identity is innate, but it is not properly nurtured. Loneliness is a norm because the normative force is human conditioning. Our roles but not our being, and I would offer we can function without those prejudices. Be who you are and let that endure.
“With some people solitariness is an escape not from others but from themselves. For they see in the eyes of others only a reflection of themselves.” Eric Hoffer (American Writer, 1902-1983)
“It is strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely.” Albert Einstein
“Loneliness is the most terrible poverty.” Mother Teresa of Calcutta
Source of Loneliness
Loneliness is interesting. People who are experiencing what they call loneliness say it’s because there are few or inadequate people in their circle of acquaintance/friendship/love, but how many people are out there that seem socially and emotionally very well connected, and yet they still complain of being lonesome? It’s not a rare complaint. Is it defined by number of peers, social activity, or emotional? Neither of the first two. There are those who live rather “cloistered” or secluded lives and don’t complain of loneliness. It’s just not a problem and they don’t show any stress related to it. What loneliness… Seek More
Lack of Self
Emotion is not synonymous with awareness, so loneliness is an absence of recognizable feedback about the “self”, a.k.a. the ego. When a little boy or little girl are out playing in the yard, I mean a young one, maybe with a pet, or watching bugs, do they complain of being lonely? I often don’t feel lonely when alone, but I do when I’m with others and the mirror doesn’t match me. Yes. You feel “you don’t belong”, that you “have no place”, a.k.a. role. I feel like a destitute amidst a sea of “socialites” and “acolytes”. Indeed, when in fact… Seek More
Reality Checking
How is not being lonely due to a correct identity superior to a conditioned sense of existing where one does not question and find they are alone? Is a suspicion of false identity necessarily present? Ok, let’s get reductionistic. The brain has been shown to engage in a process of reality checking without you choosing. It originally served the purpose of noting any radical changes in the environment to allow proper defensive response. A loud noise and crash in the bushes when everything was previously calm, and they run away from the predator. Is everything “normal” around me? Yes, it’s… Seek More
The Uncarved Block
Identity is innate, but it is not properly nurtured. The te as the Taoists say, the virtue of the uncarved block, is denied. Some children even before any conditioning are very physical and explorative, others are more observational and quiet. Any Moms care to confirm or refute this? But because the child is male (or female) when they reach the age of identification they will be conditioned without respect to their initial nature. What if our identity was that none of us have true identity? That none of us have a true reality that is our own? Would we be so… Seek More
Own Self Be True
How can one to their own self be true? You can sit. At least for moments you can sit and practice non-doing. You can let things go for moments, and as you do this repeatedly the insight gained carries on. You begin to really understand; ‘I’m doing this, I am not this’, or ‘I see this, I am not this’. When I despair I laugh loud and long. I am so well acquainted with despair I can’t take it seriously. When I am judged I laugh. The judgments are so out of synch with raw experience in communication or just… Seek More
Union with Self
Desirous of peers is one thing, desirous of personal union another? You will have no genuine union with a peer until you have genuine union with self. Otherwise the world is as ashes on the tongue, present but it feels empty. By comparison, you can’t give to another what you don’t have. Personal integrity is a personal responsibility and personal integrity is what people seek most, though they often don’t know it. Living in accordance to your personal standards is essential, and those are discovered in self confrontation not in buying into a social mass hysteria. Have you found much… Seek More
Why Are We Lonely?
Loneliness is an interesting topic though at first it might seem quite shallow. We all feel we experience it and we are all right, but the question is why? Why in this great heavily human populated world do we feel lonesome? Any ideas? Fear? Fear to open your soul? We forget we are connected? No communications skills? All true, but what do we fear? To be hurt. That one won’t be understood. Rejection. Do we really fear that we will be hurt? There are people who stay in abusive relationships and are hurt all the time even if only emotionally.… Seek More
Roles Are Not Being
The human brain has a function. It’s always ongoing and subconscious, and it’s often called reality testing. It checks input in the moment against repetitive patterns of input. Like scanning the environment while driving, if everything is going as you were taught driving should go, then you are calm and it’s all okay. In the case of our roles there was something that came before it, the desire to pair bond, the desire to birth and nurture children, and then there is a lot of artificial thinking that changes radically and usually doesn’t even need the stimulus of experience. What we… Seek More
You Are Alive
Would you say that loneliness is a result of having become unconnected to yourself and to the universe? Unconnected to your own essence? Yes. Unconnected from how you started, to where you spiritually started. You were meant to grow from there, start from there and move forward, not jump ahead and declare that you have grown up. You are meant to be someone’s mommy or daddy. Really be, not a role. You are meant to be someone’s son or daughter. Really be, not a role. Not to be molded like so much clay. You are really meant to be someone’s lover… Seek More
