'Shame' Articles
Shame is a lie. Shame is a weak attempt to grasp and hold souls. It’s a social system designed to make people willing to be pliable, and it has been very, very successful. Shame creates its own defeat, because it is an inherently flawed system. Shame enough of the little people and rather than having more compliant people, you wind up with a growing number of angry people. But we don’t have to be angry people to deal with shame in a sweeping way. We don’t have to lose our minds to regain our hearts.
You can give only what you have. If you have shame, you will give it. If you have freedom, you will give it. If you are focused on genuine spiritual freedom, you won’t have any time or energy to shame another. It’s a big spiritual world out there, much too much to experience to be bothered with these petty inherited games like who’s fault it is that you aren’t having a life right now.
“Pride attaches undue importance to the superiority of one’s status in the eyes of others; And shame is fear of humiliation at one’s inferior status in the estimation of others. When one sets his heart on being highly esteemed, and achieves such rating, then he is automatically involved in fear of losing his status.” Lao Tzu (Chinese taoist Philosopher, founder of Taoism, wrote “Tao Te Ching” (also “The Book of the Way”). 600 BC-531 BC)
Outside of Shame
Shame on you. Why do we wish shame on others? Shame is not a feeling. It’s a rule, and we try to enforce the rule. It’s not necessarily an official rule, but some cultures border on it being official. Honour is a rule also, but what is seen as honourable differs widely. To continue on the rule of shame, it serves a purpose. Sort of a parasitic bond, but does shame allow for equal exchange? Shame lessens one person. It puts one below the other. True. So it’s not even symbiotic. But who benefits from the publicly accepted social rule… Seek More
Useless Shame
Is there a good kind of shame to have? No. Shame is useless. Shame is also not conscience, though they are often equated. Who are encouraged to have shame more, men or women? Women, to be kept in their place. Women have powerful intuitive insights and strong instincts, more so than even men. Men’s instincts are sort of simple by comparison, but it’s that very simplicity that makes us less responsive to shame in the first place. It’s why women often feel they are challenged in trying to “reason” with their men, because the majority of women are deeply buried… Seek More
Experience of Shame
Anyone care to share an experience they have had with shame? Giving the wrong answer in school. Teacher made a big deal of the answer rather than just move on. And obviously believed that was necessary, but was it? Would you have learned without the histrionics? Probably participated more. So yes, but learning is a “moral” issue. Our schools were founded on that very concept. They were even originally churches. If you learned to read, it was from a priest / minister / whatever, and some simple math and writing perhaps though nothing very complex. This reminds me of what… Seek More
Scapegoats
Is shame basically instilling guilt? Shame is the belief in guilt and “justified” treatment of the guilty party. There is no justification. What can I get from punishing anyone? Have you gotten anything from punishing anyone? Actually, it just feeds my negativity. Usually makes me feel worse. Yes, and them too, and makes them associate you with pain. Even if they don’t say “You were unfair”, they don’t have to, and human instinct doesn’t care about that. If you are associated with pain, no matter what kind, you become an object of aversion, less helpful and less influential, not more.… Seek More
Shame is a Lie
The topic is shame. It’s a shameful topic. Full of shame and parts of shame. You can assemble your own shame by the time I’m done, I’m sure. Shame is a lie, to get directly to the point. It’s a social system designed to make people willing to be pliable, and it has been very, very successful. Most of our self doubt comes from having been immersed in a hard core training regimen of shame. Even to hear a voice utter in exasperation “Have you no shame?” has become so common place as to be a joke, and well, it… Seek More
Regain Our Hearts
Shame is an inherited system, but who does it serve? Those who want to control another. Are the keepers better than the kept? Are the shepards actually wiser than their flock? Have they ever been? What they have been is cunning, and perceptive, and more than willing to exploit aspects of human nature, and in the case of shame keep you dependant on their sanctioning of your valid place in society. You are told “We are wise and compassionate. We understand you are a bad person, but we will forgive you if you obey us”. Is this not so? This… Seek More
Be Not Ashamed
I’m wondering. How do we cope with so much shame going on? Cease identifying with the system, but we can’t take action based on that statement even if it’s clear. In hypnosis, they can’t use the suggestion “quit smoking” to make you quit smoking. You actually have to have a positive or present object of identification, or “ego” if you will, that will not comply with the common views of self assessment. Interesting. A good use for ego. Yes. Most of what people mean when they talk about ego is actually a set of inherited ideas anyway, and has nothing… Seek More
